Stories from Nam'

The Vietnam Chapter of the Justin Clouden International Fan Club is strong, very strong.

In my travels, I've become very accustomed to the stares, names, photos, questions and touching that I tend to encounter everywhere from Argentina to Thailand due to my size and skin color.  Nothing however, has compared to the reactions I received in Vietnam.  While I have far too many short stories to relate here regarding the six days we spent there, one stands out in my mind as too funny not to mention.

We were at the pearl farm and museum in Halong Bay when this Vietnamese family is continually pointing, staring and laughing/smiling at me.  After a couple minutes of this and following me around the museum, the mother runs up to me and grabs me pretty forcefully.  Before I knew what was going on, her husband was snapping pictures of us together.  After that, she swapped with her husband and the process continued.  Then, each of their 3 daughters each took their respective turn taking pictures with the big black guy.  All the while, every foreigner, my friends included are rolling with laughter and looking on in disbelief.  While thoroughly embarrassed, I did my best to be a good sport and ambassador of my people.  When I thought things couldn't get more ridiculous, i feel a soft caress on my arm, as the wife moved back in and was petting and stroking my biceps.  She then asks me something in Vietnamese and I must have looked at her with the blankest stare ever because my Vietnamese is just a little rusty.  One of the ladies who was cleaning pearls, who has been giggling uncontrollably at what's transpiring, decides to translate the wife's request.  "She says your very handsome and wants to know if you love her." As I frantically search for an appropriate response, she adds, "Will you kiss her?"  I shoot a glance at the husband who is nodding his head furiously with a grin from ear to ear.  At that point, I thought to myself, "when in Nam'..." and I laid a fat one right on her cheek.

Vietnam was one of my favorite stops so far because of the chance to see a society with a very communist feel that still feels strangely Western and developed.  Hanoi is your typical big city busy beyond belief.  People always talk about Bangkok of having the craziest traffic in the World, but at least there is some resemblance of traffic laws.  In Hanoi, there are very few stoplights or stop signs.  And with millions of scooters and cars moving through the city at any given moment, crossing the street becomes a life threatening situation.  You learn that you literally, need to just start walking slowly in a predictable and methodical manner and the cars and scooters with avoid you.  Some people even recommend closing your eyes.

We arrived in Hanoi around sunset and headed straight to Hotel Rendezvous, which has the most efficient and helpful staff you could ever imagine.  So amazing, that I would trust them with my first born.  The next morning we visited the Ho Chi Minn museum where we were able to learn about him, his life and philosophy.  The museum was also a huge homage to communism as everything was written in heavy communist jargon.  After the museum, we headed over to the Hanoi Hilton, the ironic nickname for the prison that held US soldiers during the war, including Senator John McCain.  Both here and at the Ho Chi Minn museum, there was very little emphasis on the US involvement in the Vietnam War.  America is looked at as the regrettable end to decades of French imperialism.  Vietnam might be the only place that dislikes the French more than the US.  The prison was focused on the torture that the French employed upon the Vietnamese, but seemed to forget the torture that American servicemen went through at their hands.  There were pictures of US soldiers playing chess, laughing, cooking turkeys for Christmas dinner, and playing basketball, which we all know was not quite the case.

The amount of propaganda in this country was definitely cool to experience as well.  Besides the commuspeak and historical portrayals, in public places, there was always a loudspeaker that transmitted a monotoned, sterile, Big Brotheresque voice in a loud booming manner. I felt like I was in the Hunger Games.  The nightlife here was also very interesting.  Everything seemed normal, with loud house music and Vietnamese people dancing in small groups, when at midnight, the police makes their rounds.  They raid and shut down all the bars that refuse to pay the bribe, which made me feel like I was underage again during an alcohol bust.  At this point, everyone, travelers and Vietnamese alike, heads to Lighthouse which is an underground club on the fringe of the downtown area in a seemingly abandoned neighborhood.

We split our time in Vietnam between Hanoi and Halong Bay, where we went on a 3 day/2 night cruise through some of the most beautiful islands and landforms I've ever seen.  We sea kayaked through caves and around islands.  We saw jellyfish (Bryce got stung by one) and played lots of Spades.  We also challenged 5 Vietnamese guys to a game of beach volleyball that become the major attraction at this local-filled beach.  Everyone stopped what they were doing and watched intensely, cheering at every point until the good ol' US of A won.  Were currently in Cambodia and will be heading to Bali shortly for the final leg of the trip.

Til' next time.